top of page
Squinker (3).png

The squinker is a recently-discovered species, and has only been found in the jungles of Mongolia and the suburbs of Kansas. Fierce and occasionally violent speculation has since wreaked havoc upon the entire zoological community. More casualties than I care to mention, sadly, have ensued. However, emerging evidence points to the likelihood that large herds of squinkers (or squinkus horribulus) have been stowing away on Mongolian merchant ships in an attempt to escape that country's newfound obsession with techno-rap yodeling. As Kansas is the world's largest importer of Mongolian ear-hair styling gel, it seems inevitable to many that Kansas was bound to inherit Mongolia's squinker problem sooner or later. 

bottom of page